Wedding are expensive

I love weddings. I love ALMOST everything about weddings. I love dressing up, I love the food, I love the open bar (!), and of course the whole wedded bliss thing. What I don’t love? The cost associate with weddings. This year I have three weddings to attend, one in which I am part of the wedding party. Here are a few things I’ve been contemplating lately when it comes to these weddings.

Placeholders/favours at a friend's wedding

How much should a bridal shower gift cost? 

The reason I ask this is that I’ve normally spent around $30, but for a wedding coming up in June, my friends wanted to go splitsies on a gift (as we often do) but they wanted to spend $50 on a gift. I had to politely decline my inclusion as I am just not comfortable spending that much. I felt like the ‘cheap friend’ doing this but I knew I would end up a Bitter Betty if I simply complied. Now, the thing that bugged me about this was that my friend’s reasoning for spending so much was the fact that the bride often spends a lot on our gifts for different occasions. Although I agree she may spend more than some people, she is fairly wealthy while I’m in a place where I need to frantically pinch my pennies. I don’t think that it is a fair comparison.

Now that I’m very obviously not a part of this ‘group gift’, I feel like I need to make my gift count. I need it to be thoughtful, tasteful, and yes cost effective. I don’t want to be the girl that got the spatula because it was the cheapest thing on the registry. I’ve decided to put together a scrapbook with wedding advice from friends, quotes, articles, recipes, and basically anything else I can think of. I think it will be great and I think I can do this for under $30. Will keep you guys posted on this project and eventually write a second post with specifics in case you want to try this as a gift too.

Cake please!

Wedding gifts + 1

The bf will be accompanying me to all three weddings. Last year we attended a few weddings, with about half being his friends and half being mine. As such, I paid the full gift for my friends and he paid the full gift for his. This year, all three weddings are my friends. Bf has more money than me (read: bf has money) but I don’t feel right forcing him to pay up for each wedding. As a result, I may be dropping a good chunk of cash myself. Does this make sense? Or should I make him pay up? As an alternative, I do owe him about $100 from various trips (yes, we split trips exactly down the middle!) so I’m thinking I will request debt-forgiveness due to all my wedding-gifting. Brilliant, I know.

S'mores table at a wedding last summer

Parties, parties, parties

As a maid of honour, I will be hosting a few parties. I know from past experience that this can get expensive. In order to mitigate the worry, I really have to start putting aside a bit of money for this each month. Since my debt is almost completely abolished, this is feasible. Yay! I don’t have long to do this but I can certainly start in May.

So, do you have a lot of weddings to attend this summer? Do you have general rules for amounts to gift for showers/engagement parties/weddings?

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6 thoughts on “Wedding are expensive

  1. I haven’t had to go to a wedding in a while and I’m thankful. Wedding shower and wedding gifts get expensive, quick, and it’s even more expensive by being in the bridal party. Thank goodness I haven’t been asked to be in someone’s wedding since I was 18! Anyway, I try to spend about $25-30 on each gift or go in with someone like my family for a larger one.

    • I know, so pricey to attend/be in a wedding! I try to stay within the $25-30 range as well. $50 on a bridal shower gift is way too much in my opinion!

  2. I’ve only been to one – an Indian one – and wasn’t part of the bridal party. I think we gave $50 cash (they didn’t want gifts).

    I don’t plan on having a bridal showr myself. We’ll probably ask for cash also but I don’t expect everyone to give gifts.

    • I don’t like the idea of having a bridal shower either except that now I feel like I’ve given so much money to other people for showers that I sort of feel like its owed back to me 🙂

  3. My wedding is a week away. Knowing that most of my wedding guests are college students or recent graduates, the majority of the gifts on the registry are less than $40. Things that can come in sets–cookware, baking pans, etc–I registered individually so that my guest had more flexibility to purchase things. I usually spend $30/gift for weddings

    • Hi Jessica! Wow, your wedding is soon! Congrats! Nice of you to pick things on the lower end of the price scale for gifts. My one friend has her registry at William Ashley (a fancy porcelain/china store) where most things are in the $100+ range. Luckily she has one at Williams Sonoma as well but that one is pricey too.

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